As a writer for children, I never intended to write a book for adult readers – other than those adults who read picture books to their children as the stars fill the night sky. But, circumstances changed in an instant when my husband, David, suffered a Traumatic Brain Injury in 2005. I didn’t know what a “TBI” was. I had never heard or seen those letters together before. But, they would soon become a permanent thought in my head.
As David stumbled into our bedroom, his hand covering his right eye, I knew something was drastically wrong. As his pain intensified and the paramedics transported him to the emergency room, I didn’t know how seriously our lives were about to change. The man, my lover, and my best friend, disappeared.
After three brain surgeries, a new man emerged. He looked different. He sounded different. He was severely disabled. He couldn’t speak beyond guttural sounds. He couldn’t walk, dress, brush his teeth, feed himself, or take care of personal hygiene without assistance. At first it seemed that he didn’t even know me, which nearly broke my heart.
David trying out his new running outfit just three weeks before his TBI. December 2004
David’s TBI has caused us to travel many long and bumpy roads. We still do nine years post-TBI, but it is a journey we take together. I met David when I was 16 years old. I knew in an instant that he would be my life-partner – for better or for worse. We’ve had the better. We’ve had the worse. We are striving for the better once again.
Though I lost the “boy/man” I fell in love with, I have fallen in love all over again with this new version of David. Though he may look and act differently, he is still the most caring, gentle, intelligent man I know. His physical disabilities did not deter him from returning to his
Donna & David 15 months AT (After Trauma)
laboratory at Columbia University a year later to oversee his and his students’ research, to write scientific papers, to become the editor of a book of research articles from scientists from around the world, and to be awarded a grant for his research.
Our journey is not over.
I’ve written David’s story, “Prisoners Without Bars: A Caregiver’s Story,” to share our journey with you, my readers. It is a story of tears and angst, of stress and confusion. The story will make you cry. It will make you laugh. It will make you wonder in disbelief just how this man is able to accomplish so much with so little. The story chronicles David’s strength and persistence, his tenacity to build a new life, and to get better against all odds. David’s story is a story of hope and inspiration.
It is also my story. As David’s wife and best friend and as his primary caregiver, I stand on the front line advocating for him every step of the way and cheerlead his every accomplishment. It’s a story that will take you with us on our journey of TBI.
I wrote the book between my caregiving duties of David, my teaching first and third graders, and when I was not sleeping. It is currently being sent to literary agents, and I hope that it will be published soon, so you can read the inside story of how David fought and is conquering Traumatic Brain Injury one unbalanced step at a time.
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(Clip Art compliments of Bing.)
(Photos compliments of ME.)